I have not been here for too long, but life has changed so much its sometimes hard to cope with. For those who can afford to be supported by their parents, its a whole new story. For those who are here to escape Nepal and taste freedom....its another story.I am serious about my studies and i wanna see myself somewhere, someday. But i am frustated at how my options are so limited. I do realize i am not a responsiblity of the US government. But why are we treated so differently, when all we are here for is a purpose to gain knowledge? The instate fee is 1/3 of what i pay and on top of that i have no rights to work legally.Thew whole Visa system is a joke. There is no distinct demarkations as to who should and should not qualify. Now its reached to a point where i met the guy from my class who failed the 12th grade. He didn't come here to study and now he is amist total chaos. So am i. Its been hard keeping good grades and making some money to pay for those grades. I feel pity for these immature kids who just get their taste of hardship and reality, raw. I lived a hard life (Financially) but it has matured me and taught me how little is enough. I have met people who have been in the same freakin' school(Community) for over 3 years...Gotddamm..freaks. You see they do not care....got jobs ...making $7 an hour or more. Where are we heading? Are Gas Stations and Fast Freakin Food all that a Neplai can do? NO i do not buy that. I have the skills and the knowledge and people who have none of that make more money and live a better life. Life is unfair. And whats with the Lottery thing. I hate it. And people so readily hop into a plane and get here clueless to reality. Let me give you'll an example. An aquintance of mine who worked in a NGO funded by Germany (**z) made a handsome living , got married had a kids and BAM ....DV paryo...la hina amrica. NOw what does he do.? NOthing....Jobless....his likelyhood of scoring here Zero. The farthest he could get was Fry's Electronics.
But again HOPE..bloody hope and dreamz Kill us.Who does not want a Future? I am no different i am a sick diseased HOPE freak. I know there is a why and i will find it. But i feel so angry at why these hard thruth or facts of how life actually is in Us does not reach the people back home. Had i know how it actually is , may be my decisions would have been different. When some of my friends mail me asking how i am doing? I tell them the truth. If you think u should come go on....but the reality is blah blah blah...tell them...
anyway enough of my rant and rave...I just needed a place to let it out....

Students In US ease please

2 years ago a Nepali guy in Boston hit a running train or vice versa..and hit himself..you're beggining to talk like him...

what are you worried about? not having accomplished anything..

well good at least you are thinkin about it and like many of us here tryin to find ourselves..

Yeah you are right I was escaping Nepal..and then i realized i can't escape reality. Back in Nepal , I would have probably been the CEO of some company because I am so and so's daughter..If i did that that would have been worse...I could never known my real self..my strength and weaknesses..now i know 4 years in trial and error and now i know how to deal with them

Like you, i have been penniless,like you ihave worked in petty gas stations, fastfoods..and i still am going..on..but then i'm half way thru graduate school, already managed a paid intern in my field..homelife is getting better what more can i ask??Money ..nobody has enough..so forgettaboutit...

three steps you can do:
never loose focus on what you want to be
never listen to anyone except your inner self
never give up ..nothing is impossible

and goodluck...if you wanna chill..there's always good beer around the corner and good frens like us..so CHILL....are you gelling yet???

Same story here. Almost through graduate school.

After you complete the struggle, I hope you will feel good. Hard life will be a good story later on.

dude
u r so full of it
who is not frustrated? everyone is
and just to let u know
going to community college doesnt make u goddamn freaks as u proclaimed
i went to community college for three years
i will be graduating this fall from a reputed college
and yeah it did help me be financially secure coz i went to community college
of course most of us makes 7 dollars an hour
but i guess we are ready to work harder
at least we can finish our college
get real
stop bitching
good luck

same with me..i came here a year back,now i am graduating this summer from grad school.sometimes i feel hopeless, looking at the job market and the kinds of job that are for us.a friend of mine is working at gas station,he has mba.there is guy i know with phd who is working is a store..this just frustrates me a lot..but then i look back.if i was in nepal i would have to deal with the maoists bandha's and the strikes.there are problems in both side,america is not perfect nor is nepal.i am hopeful that future will be bright and i think everyone of us should be hopeful.

You seem like a freshman in this country, and you?ve already started to feel the reality. Well come to the world of bitter truth brother. Try to forget those images about being a student and working happily that you had while you were in Nepal. This is how the students life in this country. You are not only alone in this quest bro; there are thousands of Nepali students like you who are working their butts off to finish their school. ?yaha ta MARERA kaam garnu parcha bhai.?(Once a guy told me) and I still remember that. You are better off in this country. Trust me! There are hundreds of thousands students who don?t have any future back in Nepal because of their financial condition. Thousands of bright students who can?t afford to pursue their studies end up going to some Middle East country to support their family back home. You know that! Don?t ask anybody but yourself if you are not better off here. You are! Again, here are some options and you can always choose one.
1. Get rid of those fat books
2. Stop looking at those students whose parents support them and work your butt off to finish what you came for.
3. Go back home.
I wish #2 works for you. Good Luck!

noxious aashish:
What you have potrayed here is the bitter reality that everyone faces..including me. I was the same like you..worked my butt off in some $7/hour paying job fulltime..going to class fulltime and what little time i had left was spent in doing the assignments and homeworks..no fun..no life nothing! One thing I had in mind all those time though was my aim and my goal. I always used to say to myself "I am not doing this shit forever". I knew I was right there..Things changed after I graduated back in 2000..Got myself my first internship and my first career job of my life as a programmer. I have been working ever since! May be I was lucky..may be I got into right place in right time but what I am saying is..at present context you might feel bad..miserable..frustrated! But think of it as a temporary thing..think of it as a god's test where you must have to pass to prove you are worth leading your life here or anywhere! The experience you have gained being in a foreign land is not going to be wasted. Wherever you are whenever you are there, you will always find it handy!
Just keep on doing what you are doing..seek out opportunities..and greatest of them all have confidence on yourself and brush your skillset(which inturn will increase your confidence) Once you believe in yourself, you don't have to rely on anyone to make them believe on you! Yes, You may not know everything but make sure you have that energy and enthusiasm to learn any damn new things that are out there and master them in a very short time. I know you can do it just simply because I did it and my friend I wasn't any different than you when I was feeling like you at this particular time.
Good Luck
Revival!

Yes Aashish,
Most of the Nepalese students experience your sort of frustrations at the beginning. But struggle and hardship pave the way to a bright future. Just work hard and do not ever think about giving up your study. Once you finish your study the light in the end of a tunnel appears. Moreover these hardships have given you the lessons of what a miserable life is all about. This first hand experience of hardships are the biggest lessons human beings can learn in our life. Once you get through to the days of hardships, you will see good things all around you.

From 1st grade till 12th grade, Education in U.S.A is totally free and wonderful after that, following 4 yrs is designed to loot every single penny from your pocket.

It is unnesscary and bais to take basics when you have finished high school, first 2 years of college is, WASTE OF TIME, where you do not learn a single refreshing thing.

I do not think four long years of college is neccessary just to major on some spefic topic. For example, in North America it takes you 7 yrs to become a Doctore, whereas in here, it will take you 12+ yrs to become one..(not that i am interested in medical field, but just giving an example) LOSS OF 5 FREAKIN YRS? CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT??

i feel sorry for the guys you are just entering college. LONG WAY TO GO Ppl...and even after 4 yrs of college do not expect some wonderful job, to get a high paid, good qualified job in U.S.A, more than 4 yrs is a absoulute neccessity.

Good LucK!!

7 yrs to become a Doctore = 7 yrs to become a doctor after finishing high school*

The starter of this thread: WELCOME TO THE US!

When u applied for the visa what did ya think, that u were entering a gold mine? or that dollares would fall from the trees? All u r suffering I guess is the culture shock but your symptoms more importantly point to "hard work phobia syndrome".

So much for humor, lol, don't take it personally.

Trasnfer to a private college, if u get good grades as u claim, u will also surely get scholarship. Second tips, develop networking, when u graduate u will get a high paying job that way.

Last but not the least, if ppl go to community colleges and work as a pizza delivery boy and don't complain, WE (u, me and others) have ABSOLUTELY NO RIGHT to call them "freaks" or complain in their behalf.

Best of luck, try being more optimistic, life here's much better than in Nepal that's why U chose to come here, corecto?

Ashish,

Do you know why all of us are even bothering to reply to your thread? 1. At one point or another in our lives we have gone through something similiar. 2. We really feel your pain and frustration 3. We wanna let you know that whatever is happening to you is nothing new AND you are not alone...

What is the difference between you and us you ask? 1. You decided to write out your frustrations... in a long ass essay mind you, without spell check! (Nothing wrong at all with that mind you... reading essays are just not my forte. 2. Called certain people freaks for no apparant reason. ITs not that they are not doing anything, they (okay exceptions are there) are working hard enough to achieve that goal. Even if you calculate it takes a whole freaking amount of time to make thousand(s) dollars with $7/ hour. 3. We (oh atleast me!) are proud to be Hopeful freaks. Whoever invented the concept was a genius.

Why am I writing this? 1. To let you know you are not the only one! 2. Welcome to real life 3. How stupid were you really when you applied to come here? I mean did you think Uncle Sam is gonna gibe you thousands of dollars just because you say you are smart and have potential? 4. Think about it a minute. 5. Dont give up!

Lastly, Goodluck! Time will get better... HOPE FREAK or not... it is something that keeps all of us going. No matter what. So dont lose that!

Ashish I think your question is valid that why we are paying more than reg. student although we are studying much harder??I try to understand ur feelings. I just like to say the same things like hushappy:
three steps you can do:
never loose focus on what you want to be
never listen to anyone except your inner self
never give up ..nothing is impossible
Good luck

hello brother

there are some college which offers instate for international students. i think they are in minnesota, why dont u check out colleges in MN.

Thanks for all of ur responses. It really gave me some positive vibes. Honestly I felt that some of you have helped me have a firmer, more determined mindset.But i will have to clear some misconceptions.
Q.Why show property and income and all that shit?
Ans: Show me another way. Would they give me VISA on my academics? I had an excellent SAT and TOEFL score but that was not even the first thing the morons looked at. It was the bank statement. And i understand why...coz my parents have to support me when I am here. Which is not the case...From the people i see around me I know that the basis for judgments are not academics...no freakin way....is it looks?? I wonder..!!
I am NOT BITCHIN' about anything...My point in starting this thread was not to stir a revolution...I know all of us are and were like this and will always be so.I havn't been here too long but long enough to see what?s going on.
Hushpuppy: Quoting u "what are you worried about? Not having accomplished anything...
No I am not worried about accomplishments....because where does accomplishment terminate?.it will never stop. If there is a devil on this earth its money. Root of all evil. I have come face to face with my weaknesses and discovered my strengths like yourself. I have been penniless a lot of time, have lived without food ....but you know it taught me what a penny is worth?I am gellin not yellin??thank you?I really value ur response.
PearlJam : I ain bitchin? Eddie Veddar worked in a Gas Station too?He did?
I just feel like a nothing man?trying to be a better man?just doing the evolution bro?
Veer: Daju dhanyabad?I do realize the bitterness of reality?and I am swallowing it everyday?Option #2 is surly my selection?.I am not saying that I feel bad that my parents can?t support me of thicken my wallet?Ghusya bau ko chora haru le k garcha malai kei chaso chaina. I was not raised like that. I come from a modest Nepali family. I do not intend to sound sahityik but? fortitude and endurance I learned it watching my mother
Revival: Bro kasam ho life ta routine nai bhai sakyo?I am really into music but I can?t even find time to even listen to my CDs let alone play some?I take ur words like a younger brother ?thanx
Meera: I am not calling ppl who go to Community college FREAKs?no I go to one too. My point was to note how some of us just stick there like leaches from godawari?I have some hand in experience of encountering these ppl. What made me use the word freak was probably their lack of intent to finish and move on?they do it just to stay legal and it annoys me.
Whateva: I definitely do not feel alone now. My post is long ass again. No I did not think Tom Dick or Harry would support me or give me money. My point was why is there not a way where we can legally work and support ourselves? Okei say no buying property, starting business and all that but just work honestly and study for a healthy wage. Why not? Thanx anyway?
I thank most of you for ur feedback, Its honestly been therapeutic. But I still breed that negativity in me , the disgust towards how unjust life is. But that hate keeps me going? that Negative Energy pushes me to be victorious over that unjust and prove to myself that, no matter how life treats me I am going to overcome it and not let it hold me down.
I think I am surrounded by a very wrong group of people because all the Nepalese I see around me are out of track and some of them have already lost it and some have give up. Now that I know u all I feel that yes I can make it too.

noxious_aashish said
"Q.Why show property and income and all that shit?
Ans: Show me another way. Would they give me VISA on my academics? I had an excellent SAT and TOEFL score but that was not even the first thing the morons looked at. It was the bank statement. "

I disagree. i didnt have much bank balance. i guess it was like $2,000. They didnt look at my bank statements. They instead looked at my SAT score.

hey psychodreamer long time no see!

Noxious broda,
now that you've also touched on the godavari leeches..remember how we used to kill them ;)..stretch them out..and put lot of salt man..they'll bleed to death and the world will be yours. Remember, World changes at a blink of an eye. Good days are ahead of you. Your realization of what you are experiencing is already a great aspect of your education.

As the great line goes experience is not what happens to you, but rather what you do with what happens to you

All the best.....

some of these messages (especially noxious aashish's
first message) kinda remind me of an OLD ITALIAN
IMMIGRANT'S TALE i read somewhere and which, I
believe, goes something like this:
-----------------
"YOU KNOW, I CAME TO AMERICA BECAUSE I HEARD THAT ITS
STREETS WERE PAVED WITH GOLD.

BUT WHEN I ARRIVED HERE, I LEARNT THREE THINGS.

NOT ONLY WERE ITS STREETS NOT PAVED WITH GOLD, HELL THERE
WERE NO PAVED STREETS AT ALL. WHAT'S MORE, I WAS THE ONE
SUPPOSED TO PAVE 'EM!
-----------------
p.s. if anybody knows of a land or country, where pre-
cooked turkeys and wild boars run amuck with knives and
forks still stuck on 'em, pls drop me a note.

karmapa

?I think I am surrounded by a very wrong group of people because all the Nepalese I see around me are out of track and some of them have already lost it and some have given up.? Asish, let me pull out this little phrase from your writing and talk about it. Please, don?t get me wrong! You can not simply judge people by looking at their present condition. I really don?t know what you see, but its true that some people are out of their track (lets be sure here that we are talking about those people we have given up their hope (or school). However, we can?t simply say that these groups of people are worthless or wrong. You are telling them wrong because you are ignorant about their past, present or their future. You know nothing about them. I have so many friends who quit their school after they got here, and I hang out with them all the time. I can?t simply say that these people were wrong or didn?t have guts to continue their studies. No, I can?t because I don?t know their family background. They might not have any choices but to quit school and support their parents and little siblings back home. Who knows!

About your frustration, I am happy to know that those inspirational writings have helped you to ease your pain.

Life is too short to be spent complaning (JB, 2004). Buckle up and move ahead........... Good luck.

This is normal in anypart of the world, not only in US. If you see people in develped countries especially UK and US, 80% of Nepali either quite their studies or delay to extend legal stay.

In other hand, expectation back home is quite high. They expect us to get degree as well as money, which I suppose is impossible at once. Here where you have to take the decision - (i) do you wanna work hard, get frustrated now but continue education, or (ii) you accumulate wealth and quit education to get frustrated later on. Decision is yours.