My First Love Lost




I will not say that he was the object of my first affections, for that would be a lie. I have been feeling passionate about people since I was very, very young. Younger probably than most people. But I deny giving those feelings the title of love.

This may seem unfair to those who don’t know the difference, but those who do will agree: calling infantile crushes love is calling a dandelion a rose. There is simply no comparison.

I suppose that we all lose our first loves, as well, and that is what makes them so sweet. But the truth is, real love is something that one never truly loses: as long as we hold onto that feeling, that emotion that is love, in its first, most pure state, we have hope, and we have the promise of bright days ahead. And your first love is perhaps your most real and most true of all loves.

It took us a year and a half to work up to “I love you,” even though we’d been saying it with our eyes for almost that entire time. He thought I was “hot,” I thought he was “cute,” his friends hated me for taking him, my friends hated me for talking about him all the time, but we were in love, and damn the rest of the world.

Every single important moment with him, from first kiss, first voicing of the tremendous feeling inside, first time making love, break up, was completely perfect. In the course of three months, I ran through every single passionate emotion a human being can possess. And I think that he would tell you the same.

Finally, I made a mistake or two, and it became apparent that he had many things to do that he couldn’t do with me there loving him deeply. I do not say that bitterly; it is the truth. We are both young and ignorant, and college draws us steadily farther away. And yet, our love draws us closer and closer together.

In the days that followed the breakup, I realized that while it hurt incredibly to have to “lose” him, I had gained him as a friend, and that was more important than anything else. Years down the line, I am sure, we will end up back together, for there is much unfinished business and untapped emotions between us.

But even if that never comes to pass, he is, and will always remain, my first love as well as one of my truest friends. There is so much I have to thank him for, and I cannot, so I merely show him in my actions how much he means to me, as a human being. I give him compassion, now, instead of passion.

Love, true love, transcends all. It does not have to be passionate. It does not have to be wild, it does not have to be romantic. True love is ALL of those things, at one time or another, but it endures through all the ups and downs, adapts to all situations, and never gives up. That is what gives those who love truly the incredible hope that all others find so amazing and foolish.

But those who love are not foolish … they are, for the first time, truly alive and open to feeling all emotions that can possibly be felt by the human soul.

I am not a fool to have loved and lost, for I lost nothing, and I gained the world.

yo "fuchi" ko ho?
"Rythm" fuchhi ta haina?
i can smell "rythm fuchhi" in every sentences!
anywayz,
nice flow of the words,*sob sob* * *emotionally sad*
luv hurts, lovs scars
love wounds, and marks...

:O speechless re kya(if one is to be believed!;oP hehe)..fiction or nonficton?;oP hehe..

duh!cant one ask to know!!!!:@ alik felt like non fiction..so wanted to be sure?;oP hehe..

and oh..just one more question..lost nothn?sure?;oP hehe..or the losses feels like nothn?when compared to ur gain?gained the world hoina?;oP hehe...yeah just a question lingering in me head..cos experiences(of me own which is diff from urs?not totally?but def diff in some ways?hehe..) ni :oS ..seldom(right now i cant even remember for once!tho im tryn to remember!:o| hehe)..have i seen/experienced..gainin anythin and losin nothn!;oP hehe..price to pay for everythin hoina?^o) hehe...

ok ok enuf of being a wet blanket hehe..its the cold here i tell u!:@..mood ni ke ke gardio!:@ dun mind hai :oD...

good day!

(wont continue here!wahahaha so pls pls dun comment!:@..shud i be checkn me mail?^o) ;oP hehe)

That was very good one. My first love happened just like that that I didn't even know that I was in love. We both realized after we broke up and it was too late for both of us. That broke up thing ruined my whole life.
It took me so many years to control myself. After that I started a new lonely life. I was always scared to fall in relationship again because of my past. Then I met this girl and I was so happy. She was my perfect match. I had my best time of my life with her. We did all kinds of things that we could do. I am breaking up again. This time, I thought I got everything and everything was perfect but I think god just don’t like to see my happiness. I wish I could stop her by going away from me but I can’t. I tried my best but nothing worked out. Love really hurts and I ain’t got courage to fall in love again. I am just tired of everything. Love sucks (for me).

hey fuchhi, i think i can totally every word of your's...yes, u gain the world! Even if u break up (willingly or unwillingly), that love always remains in your heart and that care for that specific person never dies...

nk

Miss you

who nevermind?? hmmm?????? wink wink :)

nk

i love you just for feeling that way....sorry getting too emotional her, but what can i say, love is just so cute, wheather you love someone, or someone loves you, or well you get the point.

i hope and really wish that you guys end up together down the line. i am sure you kow what you're doing, and i dont mean to barge or anything..but why not give him passion right now too.

anyways, be blessed and loved.

love is such a beautiful thing hoina ta.. "bhaye pani tension nabhaye pani tensio".....

(O:

fuchhi,
hope that all ur wishes come true and he would appreciate ur dedication. (O:

.
I miss my fu.....

fuchhi..wish you all the best.

...and YES you have gained the world.

Hence, your first love is not lost yet.

Fuchhi,

I don know abt the unfinished business but..since it comes down to untapped emotions n compassion, I sincerely hope and wish u guys will be back together! Good luck..

Nicely written.... Went thro' it a couple of times!

If, only, I were given a choice to choose between being ur first or the last love, I'ld hurriedly opt to be the 'last one'.... just to be in ur arms forever, just to see u smile when I fade away....

Many thanks for you all. 4 foe mysty, your words are so great, anonymous, hope you will pup back to put your few words .. phatte dai i think you've great experiences of your own life .. hope to hear from you more ...thanks to nevermind for beautiful songs.

Really appreciated words and compassions of nepali kanchhi di,mansion, thapap, CaMoFlaGeD, and equally to sun-shine bro ..

uhi ...fuchhi ..

Fuchhi,

First loves are meant to be lost. don't worry about it!

You will meet other people.

Fuchhi,

First love is meant to end like that. My first love had the similar experience. Her first love didnt really appreciated her that much and she came to college that aparted her from her first love. She left for college and she met me. I happened to give her everything that she wanted from her first love. Things turned out really great. She realized that it was important to be loved than to love. But later she realized that she didnt just want all those things that she was getting from me but she actually wanted those things from her first love. She realized that she wanted her desire to be true. The desire to be accecpted by the first love and not just anyone. She moved one, we broke up, and she is still as miserabel as she was cos her first love still wouldnt give her things that she wanted from him. As a result she is still the same gurl who was seeking something that she couldnt have.

fuchhi, cutely written. Your first love surely made you more experienced in life...and hence much bolder.

sidster bro many thanks. but you know untill you won't face the reality ( no matter how harsh it is ) you can't convince yourself.

thanks to pupiffy, and sajhauser for encouraging words.

see ya .

fuchhi

fucchi...pop back and put me few words re?:o| ...u thot twice before u asked that?;oP hehe..

anyways just came to say..wat u shared..kinda reminded me of this song :oD..

dyam need to find that number..if not will download it later ;oP hehe..

anyways the song is..

deep spring - common rider

do u recall the long spring days..
we used to make love..to pass our time away..
hand in hand..by the corner of the sea..
when no one was lookn..we dove into the deep..

do u think of me smtimes..?
did i slip ur mind..?
i always return to the deep deep spring..

if u have the time..i like to take u back..
cos the same sun sets..on the same train track..
do u recall the day u said to me...
"souls like ours must touch to be free"

do u think of me smtimes..?
did i slip ur mind..?
i always return to the deep deep spring..

im so close to u..just like we used to do..
now i know that everythin we ever said was true..
all i know are the trains and the fadin of the light..
forever in a zero hour..
between the day and night

do u think of me smtimes..?
did i slip ur mind..?
i always return to the deep deep spring..

there is no one i could love like u..
-------------------------------------

hehe..doesnt really sound relevant?;oP hehe..

anyways...wont ask 'questions' tis time..curiosity lai lock gareyra ako re kya ;oP hehe..i mean smtimes..there are no answers for some questions hoina?or there just any one answer?:oD..

so yeah just will say this and go..

good luck!;oD...and yeah take care a bit of urself ;o)..gain the world u might have..but can u handle the world?..no idea wat that means..lame!!!wahahahaha ;oP hehe..dyam!!question mark!:@...


good day!:oD

I don't believe in first love no matter what, you just remember them as your ex that’s abt it. The whole love thingee is trial and error method, unless you find a compatible person, and if the person is compatible and you are into her and she is into you and you don’t have fights or your fights are like wife-and-husbands then you have found your TRUE LOVE

and who said life was fair......