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 MY RESUME : JOB WANTED
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Posted on 06-26-08 7:42 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Name: Toofan Singh 

Objective:
To obtain a challenging 'Youth Commander' post in any Nepali Political Parties.

Education:
- B.S. (Crime Technology) Tihar Jail, India, August 1994
- M.S. (Criminal Sciences) Virginia Prison for International Smugglers and the Unlawful Activists(VPISUA), VA, USA, August 1996.

Thesis:
"On escaping from high security prisons like Alcatraz with minimal efforts"

Coursework:
Cop Psychology, Plastic Explosives Technology, Bomb Controls and Timer Device Theory, International Smuggling and Drug Trafficking, Theory of Election Rigging, Object Oriented Crime Design, Distributed Architecture of Nepali Politics

Work Experience:
- Research Assistant, LTTE Labs, Jaffna, Aug 1990 - Aug 1991
- Worked on the prestigious Belt Bomb project
- Developed instant death cyanide capsules in orange, strawberry; and mint flavors (Patent No. 007,13,666)
- Team Captain, Thamel Night Riders

Summer Internship:
Dawood Ibrahim and Haji Mastan Associates, Bombay, June1987 - July1990
- Worked as a hitman and was responsible for many supari style killings
- Participated in election rigging in Bihar, Birgunj and Nepalgunj
- Trained YCL members on how to make efficient 'hafta' (weekly) Collections from businessman and civil workers in Nepal.

Honors and Achievements:
- Won 1980 Gabbar Singh Memorial Award (given to child prodigies in crime)
- Member, IPKF (Indian Professional Killers Forum) student chapter
- Won 2007 Upendra-Gachhadar Memorial Award (given on efficiently carrying out 'mission-kapilbastu' project)
- Performer of the year in 2004 General Elections in Bihar and U.P.
- Strong hold on Govt. and NGOs. in Nepal and India.
- Specialized in extortion, illegal construction business and fake academic degree supply.
- Visting Faculty, YCL University.
- Personal Advisior of Baban Singh, MP, Nepal.

References:
- Dr. Charles Sobhraj, Full Time Prof., Tihar Jail, New Delhi
- Dr. Chandra Swamy, Visiting Faculty Tihar Jail, New Delhi
- Dr. Dawood Ibrahim, Overseas Projects Manager, Dubai
- Hon. Dr. Baban Singh, Chief and Parliamentary Manager for Nepal Branch, Kathmandu

Last edited: 26-Jun-08 07:44 PM
Last edited: 26-Jun-08 11:40 PM

 
Posted on 06-26-08 8:08 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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o keta ur all criteria fits to open a Revolutionary Organization and after 10 year you will be President of Nepal.

 


 
Posted on 06-26-08 8:12 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Still, you ain't close to Prachanda and Baburam.
 
Posted on 06-26-08 8:16 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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ha ha ha.. funny Bhakte...
 
Posted on 06-26-08 9:32 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Bhakte,

 Prachanda & Baburam co.  said I was over qualified and they can not hire me for full time at the moment. However, I am told, I will be given first preferences once they form government in Nepal.


 
Posted on 06-26-08 9:48 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Dear Mr. MalFunction:

Your background and skillset perfectly match with the requirements of our up-coming projects.

We want to schedule an interview ASAP. Please call us at your earliest time.

Note: H1B sponsership is not available for this project.

Human Resources Department
Golmaal Information Center (YCL Headquater)
1600 Silvania Avenue 
Kalikot, NP 00007
Phone : 007-555-4200


 
Posted on 06-26-08 11:39 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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oops....

i got it from my college group mail.. good link sabbu  


 
Posted on 06-27-08 12:44 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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dear toofan, your resume cannot top that of george W bush or prachanda...they are far better..do u have a single kill in your name?

 
Posted on 06-27-08 1:37 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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good resume  click here
 
Posted on 06-27-08 1:38 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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