you can never really know how much I wish there was something I could do or say to ease the pain being felt by all.

I have no qualifications what so ever other than my own personal first hand experiences as I have been told I am dying. The dying process, (acceptance or denial) and the grieving process are all such individual and personal issues. No two people will ever deal with it in exactly the same way. I can share my way, which I feel is the right way, for me. What I have decided is the right way for me may not be anywhere even close to the right way for anyone else. What is my way? With my faith strongly in place, I have no fear of what lies ahead for me. OK, I admit I am a little nervous about the physical process of dying. They tell me I have a high pain tolerance level but inside I know I am a wimp that just wants it to be a natural but pain free experience. The fact of the matter is, I have the easy part of this whole experience. I know I will have move on to such a more wonderful place, while my family and friends are left behind. Not only are they left behind but they are left facing the pain and grief of their loss. So, I do have the easier part, they have the much more difficult part in this whole experience. I love my family, my friends and blogging family. With this love in my heart, how can I not do anything and everything I can to help them. There will come a time when I am no longer physically here and able to help them. But, what I can do is try to help them prepare for the trying time that lies ahead. All through life, if someone is preparing for a very difficult challenge, would we not do everything we can to help them prepare to meet that challenge. Really, should this be so much different? This could be one of their most difficult challenges so how could I not want to help in any way I can. It is my hope, my prayer that by really opening up to them, by allowing all to see I am “OK” with this, it will ease worry levels now and I hope provide a level of comfort later. Through this if I can ease their burden even a little, it is worth it. While I do not fear my actual passing, there is still an element of fear or maybe worry. How will my family deal with all of this? Will they be alright without me? Naturally, I know they will be just fine as all are good strong people, but that little bit of worry still lingers. I suppose knowing they are as prepared as you can ever be in a situation like this, does lessen that worry a little. I suppose there is another factor also. I hope to leave all with good and pleasant memories of me. Me as I am, and not of some old grouch that made everyone’s lives miserable at the end. I can only hope that my last acts in this physical world will be gifts of love to my family and friends.

Love to write in simple ... so everyone can understand

 

very deep very deep indeed,
but guess it isnt suicidal..........................dherai gahan adhyyan garnu parne raichha....ma ajai ni bujna khojdaichhu

Chandan, so you have been told by the doctors that you are on the death bed? That should be totally stressful and creepy. A great write, and I should say that you are a brave soul indeed... thinking about others under such cirsumstances. Kudos

.I am speechless. It should definitely be very stressfull while waiting for the time. But again, aren't we all waiting for our time? I know it's easier for me to say this but it'll be thousand times harder for me if I were in your shoes. Death is inevitable. It's sure to come and comes to us all of a sudden. Most of us don't know when and how, may be tomorrow or few more years, may be painfull or peaceful. But now when the time left is known, I would say enjoy it the fullest and end it with a smile. I am sure there's another beautiful world waiting for us .

Thanks for writing.

No Rythm the doctors never told any one like that...thats wat  i was feeling when i was in that condition....different vivid thoughts were commin to my mind......

 

like  Some one was pulling ya from your place ....you  tried to scream,,,,vocal chord was in full vibration but no sound could be heard by others.....u feel like u r alive but not alive nor dead......one who was taking u away must be the Diablo... At last u heard the Goddess(mother) magical voice ...and her strong Grip on ur hand... that kept u... from slipping to the other place....  then suddenly u feel that u r there   ....alive ..... 

f**k mite i am f**uking Speechless..

chandan, if you don't mind me asking, what were you actually diagnosed with?

tell me, it's a fiction.

MR. AVIATOR

SAY   "NO"!  TO  DRUGS

 

Thats only thing i can tell ya

 

Mr.?..........better call me miss.

okay, so it's the case of drugs!

oh sorry....miss (AVIATOR)

Chandan,  If it true, I am really sorry,  but I hope it is just a fiction not a fact!!!!!!!!!!

Hey frens I m back now,,, its been long time...

So how r u know?

Very well,, got New life,,, wanna make it lively now.... was in dark cave since very long time.. 

And he though he could get away with it....

well, fiction होस या साँचो, कुरा गहिरो नै हो। मैले जहिले पनि मेरो जिवन को लक्ष पैसा, मोज मस्ति भन्दा पनि मर्ने बेला खुशि साथ मरुँ भन्ने ठानेको हुँ । तर यस पात्र ले मेरो सोचाइमा नया आयाम दियो। त्यो के भने खुशि साथ मर्न आफन्तलाइ पनि रिझाउनु आवष्यक छ न कि आफ्नै मनलाई मात्र ।

Ya i did respond.. and i responded all in context of my life and i too have written how i felt when i was in that condition..

Dherai jaso le yehan guf ni hanchan... tara i told u the truth about myself.... but i don't think anyone will understand me...