When I waved goodbye to my family and to my one true love at the Tribhuvan airport last June, I had to fight back the tears that threatened to break loose. Leaving behind my family, my home and friends was difficult. But it was the hardest thing to tear myself away from the man I had grown to love in the few months spent in Nepal. It was a different pain, a different suffering.

Isn't it strange that our parents spend their entire lives caring, nurturing, and providing for us, and then there comes this one person who goes on to claim your entire being for the rest of your life? Months ago, when I went to Nepal for my research trip, my mind held only action agendas and unnamed fears. I had no inkling of meeting this person whose impact would be so strong that separating myself from him would wound me so gravely. As usual, my parents were dotingly advising me to look after my health, studies, and to call home often. He hardly said much but when I looked at his eyes, there was an unspoken sorrow so deep that it cut into my heart. My parents' affectionate words were no match for that soundless sorrow. Their years of unstinted love grew faint in the immense glow of his gentle face that promised a future of unstinted love.

In the months since I returned, this notion has haunted me -- this changing need for a different kind of love as we age. How the terribly thrilling pangs of romantic love with longings and dreams that are limitless replace the levelheaded parental love that now begins to seem somewhat obsolete is truly one of the greatest mysteries of life. It is not to say that we don't care about our parents or love them any less. But when that special person enters your life, he/she illuminates your being in such a blaze that obliterates everything else. Loyalties shift, priorities alter, not just in your viewpoint, but also in the eyes of those around you. When I call my parents nowadays, they always ask me to call him as well. Of course, that's how parents are. Their children's happiness is paramount to them. But it's really strange how we children become so enveloped in this new found bliss that it becomes all-pervading. Perhaps that's what makes us "children" and not "parents" because we are not yet able to step beyond our own needs in the way parents are. But if you come to think of it, being able to love this other person, this special person, is a step toward devoting your affections in someone other than yourself. And that is the greatness, the beauty of love where the self and the other are no longer separate entities but are bound together by this strange thing called love.....

WOW!! it's weird but i think i totally understand what you're talking about!! :) :)

You're so right weeping willows ~ that's exactly what I too wonder sometimes!
By the way -- excellent narration and wonderful analysis. Juist one theme, but three approaches:

Isn't it strange that our parents spend their entire lives caring, nurturing, and providing for us, and then there comes this one person who goes on to claim your entire being for the rest of your life?

..romantic love with longings and dreams that are limitless replace the levelheaded parental love that now begins to seem somewhat obsolete is truly one of the greatest mysteries of life.

But it's really strange how we children become so enveloped in this new found bliss that it becomes all-pervading.

Keep it Coming!!

~@~

Oh nails -- How've you been?

Saajha - not bad not bad!! how's everything with you? i haven't talked/seen you in a longgggggggg time!!
:D

well dude I can understand ur real problem..........

it's all coz ur love is young...... I mean it's not been a long time......you guys are in love rite.........

-Rockend

wow, what a wonderful expression dividing two diffrent ways of love.All u have to understand and to know is ,this is how life flows and keep goin.
have a faith in love and it won't take u to HOV.

well said 'weeping willow'

felt good to read thru your article as i had been thru a similar situation. the only difference was that it did not involve the dilemma between Parental love and the Love of life.

This is where theory of two main types of love comes into play: passionate love and companionate love. Passionate (or romantic) love represents a state of intense absorption in someone. It includes intense physiological arousal, psychological interest, and caring for the needs of another. In contrast, companionate love is the strong affection we have for those with whom our lives are deeply invloved like our parents and other family members.

"It is not to say that we don't care about our parents or love them any less. But when that special person enters your life, he/she illuminates your being in such a blaze that obliterates everything else. Loyalties shift, priorities alter, not just in your viewpoint, but also in the eyes of those around you. "

ww,
couldn't have said it better. u spoke my mind! :P...on a similar note, when u will get married and have lovely "bhantyang-bhuntungs" (kids), the optical center of the 'love lens' will then shift more towards them from your better half! strange it is indeed... this four lettered magical word called L-O-V-E. :P

LooTe
PS "pheri pani mero kehi gunaso chhaina" hahahaha :P

I was able to witness the most emotional scene that can be possibly imagined. It was towards the end of the wedding when it was time for the bride to bid farewell to her family and follow her new found husband. Although the rituals to which these two had been proclaimed as one was over in her heart the new bride still had not realised the full trauma of leaving her house until this moment. As her parents gave her hand to the groom, she at first followed him. After a few steps, the bride broke away from her husbands’ arms and ran to her mother who tried to hide the tears that welled up in her eyes and placing a stone on her heart with one hand she hid her eyes and with the other, she waved the girl back to her husband.

The young man so taken aback with this moment looked at the bride’s mother, with a simple nod held out his arms, and called her: her movements however showed that she did not know what to do. Here she was at the boundary of her life. Just beside her mother was the single man who had ruled her life: her father. He stood there and a single tear fell from his eyes to the ground. Could she be able to forget all that to follow the man she loved? Maybe: but do not be in such a hurry said her hands: just wait a little and let me gaze a little longer at these dear parents of mine who, until I met you, were all I had to live for.

As she looked that side of the boundary, she saw the place where she had spent all her life until now and she did not want to leave. Slowly the other side came into focus. There was her future and he was calling out to her. His gestures showed that life required that she too should be a wife and a mother. And all this went on amidst the sound of the people around them and the band playing in the background. Finally having kissed her parents, she ran a few steps and without looking back followed her husband into the beautifully decorated car. He hurried her off and as the car drove off, she had known from the time she was born, the gesture he gave was of sweet promises of the future. This whole scene was so captivating that I just stood there for moments simply spellbound.

...and if there was a brother who stood beside the bride. may be he wanted to cry too but no... he looked around, the mother was crying, he sees tears in the father's eye, and the bride, his sister turns and hugs him as if that was the last hug...he promises, he will be always there for her... he tried hard not to let the tears fall off but the damn tears… didn’t hold up this time… yup, this strange thing called love.

Hey guys,
you're making me cry today...
Weepingwillows, nice narration..simply loved it..
Shakshi...captivating scene indeed...
November..you made me cry...:(

great narration! is it a true story or your imagination? i enjoyed every bit of it. so i guess, it does not even matter if it were a fiction. keep on coming.


Jai Hos!

yestai huncha maya peratii bhane ko

Peeraaatii... sachai hudo rahecha!
Mutu sachai nai dukho rahecha!!

weeping willows, you've expressed your feelings very well, and you are damn right about it. 3 years back, when I was waiting at tribhuwan airport to come to this state, everybody was crying, my parents specially. I was so exicted and happy to start my new life that I couldn't understand why they were crying, after all I am only coming to US to study. But, as soon as I went inside the airport, I had a strange feeling, I start feeling the pain in my heart, suddenly I looked back to see my parents, my freinds,but they were far from my sight, I couldn't see them, for a moment I felt I will never see them again, I wished if I could see them once but I couldn't, as soon as I came out of my thought, I realised tears were coming out of my eyes too, then I knew why they were crying.

Last summer when I went back home, when I saw my parents, my friends after 3 years, it was a great experience, I cannot express my feelings, but if I have to describe my feelings in one word, then I will say WoW!!!!.

WEll sandiyana timro lagii arko naration garu ma pani la....... tara ajo haina....... WEll get ready wid a tissue ..........

Then only alright......... you'll cry not weep..........

hahaha!!!!!!! eehehehe!!!!!!

-Rockend........